Hunting elephants is cool, especially if they are blue elephants and you have a blue elephant gun.
MAD Magazine had a series of books entitled "Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions". They're filled with this sort of thing.
I may have to pick those up.
when people at the store ask me "gosh, are all those kids yours???"i want to say "no, i just drive around the block and ask if the neighbor kids want to come shopping with me because shopping with kids is SO MUCH FUN!!!!!"